


Our love is hard to keep

by icantswiim



Category: Naruto
Genre: Bottom Kakashi, M/M, Top Tenzou, i promise i’ll finish this fic i swear, idk where this is going sorry, kakashi is lowkey a sub, tenzou is lowkey a dom, the plot is iffy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:35:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21843031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icantswiim/pseuds/icantswiim
Summary: This is the sequel to “Maybe we can do this”Tenzou and Kakashi’s story on how they got together, and all the trauma and shit that led up to it.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Yamato | Tenzou
Comments: 16
Kudos: 87





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Im back! i hope you guys like this first chapter, i have no outline for this fic i just know im going to work my hardest on it! enjoy the brief smut in the beginning (:

“Oh fuck Tenz!” 

Kakashi couldn’t hold back the filthy things tumbling out of his mouth as he was shoved down even further into the pillows. His hands were clutching the headboard of Tenzou’s bed, fingers completely numb. He cursed again, face completely red from embarrassment. 

“You’re being so dirty today,” The anbu was forcing down laughter, enjoying how thoroughly fucked Kakashi was at the moment. It wasn’t very often he’d worked the copy nin up this much. Clearly his last mission had taken way too long. 

Unfortunately he needed to end this, he hadn’t even checked in with the Hokage yet. 

Tenzou gripped the jounin’s waist with one hand and let the other drift down, jerking him off hard and fast. Kakashi struggled to breathe as he was fucked so hard he couldn’t even make any noise. His fingers cracked through the wood design of the headboard and he scrambled to hold onto anything else in reach. He was flipped onto his back where he immediately reached up and sunk his nails into the wood user’s shoulders. There was a banging against the wall as the next door neighbors angrily yelled at them to shut up already. 

Both men ignored it, too horny to care. Tenzou groaned as he came, reaching out to give the jounin’s neck a good squeeze. He relaxed into it, eyes rolled back. A spluttering cough was enough to bring him out of his daze and he looked down to a very red, very starved of oxygen Kakashi staring back at him. 

“You little slut!” Tenzou laughed as the man beneath him moaned lowly. He felt the tell-tale warmth splash against both of their abs and wasn’t even surprised that Kakashi had come so suddenly. The man loved being choked after all. They both tried to catch their breath as they came down from their orgasm highs. 

“Thanks for breaking my bed frame, I worked really hard on that intricate headpiece,” Tenzou wasn’t actually mad, just a little annoyed. 

Kakashi scoffed. “Next time don’t fuck me so hard I have to hold onto something,” 

The anbu spluttered as he tried to think of a retort. 

They both laid there for a few more minutes enjoying the after-sex haze. Tenzou was first to get up, pulling on his gear and haphazardly wiping the come off his chest with the end of his bedsheet. 

“Classy,” Kakashi observed. 

“I have to check in from my mission! I told my team I was going to the hospital to stitch up my arm!” Tenzou was pulling on his boots now, awkwardly jumping to get his feet in all the way. 

“Well are you?” The older man cocked his head, making Tenzou’s chest fill with that familiar feeling. He hated that feeling. 

“No, it healed all on its own.” 

Kakashi knew it was thanks to the First Hokage’s DNA running through him, although he wasn’t about to say that out loud. Not when they had just finished having some awesome sex. 

“Have fun explaining that to your neighbors,” Kakashi chuckled as he wiped his stomach off with an old tissue. Tenzou couldn’t help but stare as the older nin cleaned himself up and pulled on his briefs before plopping back down on the bed, somehow making it all look graceful. 

“They’ll get over it, I fix their wobbly chairs all the time,” The anbu rolled his eyes as he realized he probably owed them a new table for this one-with some nice teakwood. Kakashi had been..especially noisy today. 

Again. Whoops. 

“Don’t leave your come tissue on my bed this time. Throw it away when you leave,” Tenzou watched as Kakashi stared at him blankly in response. 

He swiftly teleported to the Hokage Tower and winced as he walked into a waiting Lord Hiruzen. Even though he was fond of Tenzou, he wasn’t one to wait on other people. 

“Captain, you’re late.” He had his hands folded out in front of him, knuckles stiff with impatience. 

“Apologies Lord Hokage, I had an injury I couldn’t quite heal myself,” A blatant lie, but there was no way he was going to tell him what had really happened. 

“Don’t let it happen again. You’re dismissed.” He waved one hand in the air as he began signing some documents. Tenzou teleported away, grateful he seemed to have caught him in a semi-decent mood. He showered and changed into his off-duty anbu gear before heading back home where Kakashi was likely still asleep. He tended to stay later these days. It was nice. 

He walked into the jounin snoozing on his bed. His body ached as he finally let himself process everything that had happened on the mission. And everything with Kakashi. 

It was all so complicated. 

The wood user fixed his bed frame with a quick jutsu before laying down. He was too tired to think about anything right now. He just wanted to sleep. 

*~*~*~*~*~* 

Tenzou woke to the sound of rustling and opened his eyes just as Kakashi leaped out of his open window. It was dark out, they’d likely slept through the whole day. 

He stretched lazily before turning over and checking the time. 

“SIX AM?!” Tenzou’s eyes widened as he realized he’d slept almost 24 hours straight. His back was stiff and his mouth was very dry. Apparently he was more fatigued than he thought. He remembered his ex-captain and sighed. 

‘Poor Senpai’ He thought sadly. 

Kakashi hadn’t been on any rough missions lately, so his dark circles and 24 hour nap was likely due to his terrible sleeping habits. The anbu grinned at the thought of his senpai sleeping soundly because of him. It made his chest do that thing he hated again. 

‘Well I have nothing to do today, I’m going back to sleep’ The wood user flopped back onto his stomach and pulled the comforter over his head to block the sunlight that would be peeking in soon. 

He was still so tired. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The next few days slipped by Tenzou, who slept through most of them. It seemed he had a case of slight chakra exhaustion and it was just enough to cause that sluggish feeling in his veins. 

He didn’t see Kakashi much, who was busy with his own little team of genin. His senpai had finally found a good trio to train. Unfortunately the genin were pretty complicated considering two out of the three were monitored by anbu everyday. Then again it made sense that the Hokage would pair them with an ex-anbu jounin. 

There was a tapping at his window and he looked over to see a scroll laying on the windowsill. He opened it and chuckled at the lazy scrawl made by Kakashi. He wanted to spar and have lunch. 

How unusual. 

He put on his anbu uniform and stopped by some udon place to grab food. It figured he was the one paying. Tenzou could hear what Kakashi would say as the thought ran through his head. 

‘If you get to come in me the least you could do is pay for my meal.’ It was his favorite excuse to mooch off the wood user. 

Tenzou’s ears turned red as he hurried faster to the training field. His senpai really was a mooching little whore.

They’d agreed on their hidden spot far from any other possible people. Tenzou was anbu, and a wood user at that. If anyone saw him using that jutsu he’d be in serious trouble. 

“Yo, Tenzou,” 

He turned to see the jounin pulling kunai out of a nearby tree. Nostalgia hit him as he thought about all the training sessions they’d had here together. 

“Hey senpai, I brought udon to share,” Putting the food down and using a quick wood jutsu to make a table, the younger ninja patted the floor next to him. 

Kakashi pocketed the kunai and sat next to Tenzou. He closed his eyes and sniffed the air, comforted by the sweet smell of his kohai and fresh noodles. His shoulders unscrunched a tiny bit as he ate and his visible eye lost some of its tension. This didn’t go unnoticed by Tenzou. 

‘He’s comfortable around me,’ Tenzou realized as he took a particularly big bite of udon. It hit him suddenly that Kakashi was subconsciously lulled by him. That he was comforted by him. The wood user knew it wasn’t something that Kakashi had noticed himself, otherwise he’d be acting more aloof and distant. 

Tenzou thought of the night they’d shared a few years ago when Kakashi was a little more cold hearted. The possibility of a future with Kakashi. It made his body ache again and he was suddenly so tired, blaming it on the chakra exhaustion. 

A sneeze brought him back from his thoughts, and he turned to see Kakashi with his mask hanging below his nose, sneezing and shaking his head like a dog. 

“Use a tissue senpai,” he teased lightly. It felt like old times for a brief moment and both men made eye contact, Kakashi looking away first. It was cute, the way he submitted to Tenzou. He’d been doing it more often in the past few years. Neither of them mentioned it, the anbu had just accepted it as a part of who Kakashi was now. He’d gained some more humanity with his genin team, even starting to train one of them for the upcoming chunin exams. 

Kakashi groaned, eyes watering. He’d pulled his mask back up all the way and was trying to hold back the sneezing fit Tenzou was sure was coming. He’d seen enough of them to know. Sure enough, the jounin shook his head as he sneezed violently several times in a row, looking like one of his own ninken. Tenzou laughed until he wasn’t even making any noise, just silently wheezing. His chest was all warm and fuzzy and the ache in his entire body that he’d felt earlier was completely gone. 

Kakashi eventually stopped sneezing and glared at his kohai, who was will laughing at him. 

“Alright Tenzo, lets spar.” He sprung forward and knocked the wood user down, aiming a punch right at his face. Tenzou was able to use a substitution jutsu at the last second and avoid the powerful hit. Laughing at Kakashi had been a mistake, he realized as he was targeted over and over by the very lethal aim of flying shuriken. Adrenaline kicked in, mixing with the sluggish flow of his chakra and Tenzou struggled to keep up with his senpai. 

They sparred for hours, switching from taijutsu to ninjutsu to genjutsu, even tracking each other until it was basically glorified hide and seek. By the end both men were panting, laying side by side in the grass. It was dark out and the moon was almost full, barely lighting the sky above them. Tenzou looked over at Kakashi before turning back to look at the sky. It was a beautiful night out. 

He turned towards Kakashi again, heart beating in his chest. He reached out and grabbed the older nin’s sweaty hair at the nape of his neck, pulling him closer until their foreheads touched. Kakashi stared at him with a questioning look in his eye before Tenzou’s other hand went to reach for his mask. He paused, giving Kakashi plenty of time to stop him before pulling it down gently. He looked into the other man’s eye one more time before leaning in and kissing him slowly. It was something they’d never done before. They’d never kissed unless it was in the midst of sex. And they’d especially never kissed like this. 

Tenzou’s heart suddenly ached again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact~tenzou’s neighbors are actually retired shinobi who would hate him if he didn’t save them a significant amount of money on furniture every year.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi discovers a part of himself he didn’t know existed, tenzou reacts the only way he knows how-dominantly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A fluffy but slightly juicy chapter, why do i love them so much as a couple omg

Tenzou couldn’t sleep, the kiss with Kakashi replaying over and over in his head. They hadn’t done anything more than that. They hadn’t even made out, yet it was the most intimate thing he’d ever done with the jounin. His heart was racing even thinking about it. He’d kiss Kakashi a hundred times and not get tired of it. 

He sat up in his bed and stared at the wall briefly before deciding he likely wasn’t getting much sleep tonight. He pulled on his sandals and made his way to Kakashi’s apartment. Maybe if he saw the man he loved right in front of him he’d calm down. The wood user winced as the thought ‘loved’ passed through his head. Leaping over rooftops with silence only an anbu could, he finally reached a tree across from his senpai’s building. Feeling rather reminiscent tonight, he paused briefly to breathe in the familiar scents. He snorted when he thought about the time Kakashi~with his enhanced sense of smell~complained living close to the dango shop was ruining his “figure.” It was tempting. Even now at 2am knowing they were closed. 

He snapped out of his thoughts and leaned against the spot he usually did when spying on Kakashi. When he finally focused his eyes on the bed in the window though, he realized the jounin wasn’t there. He reached his chakra out to confirm there wasn’t a presence in the room and rolled his eyes. Of course the idiot wasn’t home when he needed him to be. Fortunately Tenzou knew of a few places he could be. 

After checking the graveyard, the memorial monument and Kakashi’s favorite tree above that bench across from the academy, Tenzou made his way to a small stream outside of the village. It was hidden away from the main river, and Kakashi had showed him his favorite little spot more than once. 

Sure enough, once he reached the rockier part of the shore he saw his senpai tucked away-grey hair damp and uncovered eye fixed on him. No jacket of course, the fool. 

He couldn’t quite read Kakashi at the moment-which would’ve been unusual since the jounin never really hid his chakra from Tenzou. But it made him feel a little better since it was likely due to the kiss they’d shared-if the small flush on Kakashi’s face was anything to go by. He was ninety percent sure at least. 

“Senpai stop playing with your lips through your mask, it’s unsettling,” The wood user smirked, seeing the other man turn to him blandly and just pointedly stare. It was a tactic he’d grown used to. Where others would get intimidated and a bit scared Tenzou just laughed, smile reaching his eyes when Kakashi joined him. 

‘God he hasnt laughed in so long’ Tenzou’s laugh became a little strained as the thought passed through his mind. It made him feel better knowing he was the reason his senpai was laughing, as selfish as it was. 

“So Tenzou, what are you doing here?” Kakashi was staring up at the sky, leaning back on his palms. He looked a little angsty, nothing new. 

“Well Kakashi I just couldn’t sleep and wanted to see you,” he used his name instead of the usual honorific to punctuate his seriousness. Kakashi however, didn’t look away from the sky. He seemed to be thinking. Tenzou waited for him, like he always did. 

“I think Sasuke will be ready for the chunin exams by next week. The chidori actually seems to be pretty easy for him,” As Kakashi said this he finally turned to look at Tenzou, blush still visible even in the dark. The anbu loved it. 

“Fuck you and you’re night vision, Tenzou I’m being serious!” 

The sub in Kakashi was so easily stirred by Tenzou, although it was obvious right now that he didn’t seem to like it. Whoops. 

“Senpai, it’s okay to want to be dominated around me, that’s what I’m here for,” Tenzou leaned closer and pressed their foreheads together, noticing the way Kakashi wouldn’t meet his eyes. It was so cute. 

The older nin seemed to freeze up suddenly, and Tenzou could literally feel the moment that he was shut out. He could no longer read Kakashi, and the blush that was so distinct earlier was gone. There seemed to be no one home in Kakashi’s visible eye. It was a tactic the jounin had learned in anbu on the particularly hard missions. Tenzou always scolded him when he used it since it was more of an unhealthy coping mechanism than a jutsu. 

“Sorry senpai, did I overstep my boundary?” Tenzou backtracked as quickly as he could before all the progress they’d made so far was gone. Kakashi turned so he was facing Tenzou completely and sighed before going to stand. 

“I’m trying to not to push you away but it’s hard when you do that to me,” Kakashi wasn’t looking at him, hands shoved deep into his black pajama pockets. Tenzou noted again that the idiot wasn’t wearing a jacket. 

Tenzou frowned before responding, “Do what..?” 

He was genuinely confused. He didn’t do anything except flirt a little. 

“That’s my point,” the jounin said exasperatingly.  
“You don’t even have to try to stir me up it just happens,” He was flustered again, hands clasped to jutsu away. 

“You don’t get to leave yet Kakashi.” 

The sentence sent shivers down his spine and he dropped his hands by reflex. Tenzou’s tone was a warning one and he wasn’t going to disobey it now. Kakashi exhaled and let himself enjoy being told what to do. 

“Let’s go back to my place.” 

It was another order, and the older nin felt himself move by instinct again to grab ahold of the wood users arm so they could teleport away. 

Tenzou quickly teleported them into his bedroom, eager to go to sleep. Kakashi was right by his side the whole time, only letting go of his arm to let him peel his shirt off. The wood user laid on his back, making sure to leave room for Kakashi to sprawl out next to him. The jounin fell asleep quickly, confirming Tenzou’s suspicions about his lack of sleep. 

‘Seriously’ the anbu thought, ‘how does he manage to take up the entire bed?’ 

Kakashi looked so calm sleeping at the moment, it surprised Tenzou. He honestly hadn’t thought the older nin would’ve listened to him when he told him not to leave-let alone react the way he did. It was like he was under a jutsu, except he wasn’t. He was too tired to think too much about it right now though. 

Tenzou took one last look at the serene face of his senpai before laying back to go to sleep. He grabbed one of Kakashi’s legs and pulled it over his body, rubbing it softly until his eyes became heavy and he drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let’s be honest, Tenzou knows all his senpai’s hiding spots lol


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a sad but also fluffy chapter, nothing too serious here folks -*peace sign*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhhhh im so sorry i haven’t gotten a chapter out in four months !

The chunin exams snuck up on Tenzou faster than he’d like to admit. He hadn’t ever been excited for them because he’d always been too busy guarding the Hokage Tower or border walls from other village’s to enjoy it. This year was different though. 

This year his senpai was a jounin leader. 

He smiled at the thought of it. Who would’ve thought his cold-hearted captain would be in charge of not just one, but two of his own genin for the exams. Unfortunately the kunoichi hadn’t made it past the first exams, but she put up a good fight. 

The anbu gazed towards the arena where the first fight had started to take place and for the first time in his life wished he had been stationed there. 

Unfortunately for him he was stuck at the south wall as usual. The Third Hokage had always given him the south wall since it had more ground to cover. For some reason it was almost twice as long as the north gate, and at least one and a half times as long as the other two side walls.

It was fine since he was an exceptionally good tracker ninja, and his chakra detection was better than most but still-it got boring. 

Not today though. 

Tenzou felt his blood run cold at the sudden feeling of the Kyubi’s chakra in the air. He quickly made a clone before transporting to the arena where he was stopped by another anbu who shook his head and pointed down below at the current of orange chakra below. 

“Lord Third told us you might come here if you sensed that chakra. For now everything’s under control but we’d like you to stay and monitor the rest of the fight. I’ll be relieving you until then.”

The wood user nodded once before stepping back into the shadows. His clone dispersed when the other anbu had reached it’s location, flooding his mind briefly with its memories. He narrowed his eyes at the fight down below and tried not to be too annoyed at the fact that he hadn’t been told about this rather large detail. It would’ve been nice to know that Naruto had learned to use some of the Kyubi’s chakra. Was he not trustworthy of knowing?

Tenzou’s body remained tense and wound tighter than he would’ve liked during the fight. He couldn’t shake the feeling of dread lying low in his stomach. The feeling of knowing what could come of this chakra. He was just a child during the last Kyubi attack, but not young enough to forget the damage it had caused the village. 

However, soon enough it was over and surprisingly it seemed his senpai’s genin had managed to win the match despite his opponent, a formidable hyuuga. 

Impressive. 

When he could no longer sense the foul chakra circling the air and seeping into his bones he transported again to trade spots with the anbu who’d been relieving him. 

Tenzou sighed when he was alone again. The chunin exams weren’t at all entertaining. He hadn’t gotten to see his senpai and had to make sure that the jinchuriki didn’t lose control of his chakra for the last half hour he was there. He realized how civilian of him it was to actually think he could enjoy such a thing and laughed out loud before stopping to sigh again. 

He sounded crazy. 

He wasn’t actually going insane. He just hadn’t had any time off lately with the task of guarding Lord Third almost twenty four hours a day for four days a week. He still had his other duties to attend as well and it all stacked up into no days off and just enough sleep to keep him from deprivation. 

But he was an anbu, he could handle it. It was all he knew after all. 

Tenzou resigned himself to scanning the trees and horizon every few minutes, habitually feeling out with his chakra to ensure there was nothing threatening nearby. Besides the occasional spy or lost traveler there never was much activity there anyways. Everyone knew the Leaf Village was the strongest among nations. He thought back to Kakashi, and why he hadn’t been at the chunin exams. He was jounin leader of two genin participating. Tenzou shook his head softly, realizing it was silly to question his senpai’s actions They hardly made sense to anyone else anyways, the fool. 

Hours passed by with no movement. It was almost mundane in that aspect. Tenzou was adjusting his anbu mask when he felt it. It made him instantly nauseous. He knew that disgusting chakra could only belong to one shinobi. 

Orochimaru. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The funeral of The Third Hokage seemed to drag on forever, Rain flooding the entire village. Tenzou attended from afar, replaying the last moments he’d spent with Lord Third over and over in his head. 

The old man had locked himself in a seal with Orochimaru and demanded nobody help him, that it was his duty to kill his former student. Tenzou had no intention of listening to him-using all his chakra to try to break the powerful barrier between them. He was quickly draining all of his reserves when Danzo had appeared, demanding he stop and for the first time that the wood user had seen, held a real emotion in his eyes. He’d told Tenzou that Lord Hiruzen needed to do this on his own, that it was his will. 

And so Tenzou had stopped trying. He instead watched the Third Hokage fall in battle, and along with the few other anbu there at the time put up with the looks and murmurs back at the anbu barracks. He knew they would’ve done the same thing in his position. But that wasn’t worth explaining to anyone. They weren’t there, they had no idea what had happened. 

It hurt a little, realizing how quickly he went from well respected to gossiped about in the span of a day. It left the wood user more than a little irritated and he left to train alone. 

*~*~*~*~*~*

Tenzou felt a fizzle of chakra throughout his arms and knew that he should take a break, that his body could only perform so well before it became sluggish. He gripped a shurikan in his hand and pressed the sharp edges into his fingertips. It felt good to be able to feel something that wasn’t an emotion and he pressed it deeper. Blood dripped onto his sandals and he let go of the it, squinting at the tiny lines of now beaded blood on his fingers. He thought back to when Kakashi had rescued him from the foundation, and Lord Third has welcomed him into anbu so warmly. It made his body ache. He hadn’t felt this kind of loss before, it was new to him. It felt similar to flashbacks of his childhood as an experiment, and he pressed the blade deeper again before loosening his grip on it.

It hadn’t cut deep at all, just enough to leave evidence of his brief anger. He healed quickly due to the First Hokage’s DNA inside of him. Usually it intrigued Tenzou, today it only disgusted him. 

“Yo Tenz,”

The anbu jerked his head towards Kakashi, who was walking towards him rather hesitantly. 

Tenzou immediately relaxed his chakra, not wanting to let on how upset he was. He didn’t really want to see Kakashi at the moment anyways, too upset at the thought of losing Lord Third. The jounin eyed him suspiciously, mask shifting in a familiar way that Tenzou knew meant he was sniffing. 

“Did you hurt yourself?” Kakashi folded his arms and stared at Tenzou, waiting for a response. 

“I just cut my fingers on a shurikan, picked it up too fast and it slipped out of my hand,” 

Kakashi reached his hand out and Tenzou placed his injured one over it, letting his senpai look it over. He flushed when the older nin slipped his mask down to stick one of his fingers in his mouth, sucking softly. 

“Kakashi-“ he was silenced by the look in his senpai’s eyes. It was a mix of affection and laziness, something only he could manage to pull off. 

He scraped Tenzou’s finger against one of his sharp canines before finally letting it go and pulling his mask back up, stepping closer to the wood user and offering his hand again. 

Tenzou reached out again, lacing his fingers between Kakashi’s before being pulled down onto the ground and into a very intense sparring match. He avoided several mean-spirited punches and rolled them both over, pinning both of Kakashi’s hands onto the grass and glaring at him. 

“Kakashi, what the fuck?” 

He was annoyed at the way the other man would switch between caring and aloof. Normally he had the patience for it. Not today though. He was too tired. 

Kakashi’s visible eye widened briefly and he tensed against the younger man. His fingers twitched in that familiar way and Tenzou knew he was thinking about teleporting away. He let go of the other man’s hands and sat back, annoyed with himself.

“I’m sorry senpai, I didn’t mean to startle you, today hasn’t been easy for me,” He held out his hand again to the jounin in front of him apologetically.

Kakashi grabbed it loosely, still tense and ready to flee. He had been close to Lord Third too. Today hadn’t been easy for anyone. 

“I heard what the other anbu are saying about you, I also know you were told not to do anything by Lord Hiruzen. We don’t have to talk about it, just know I don’t think those things about you Tenz.” 

The wood user wasn’t surprised his ex-captain had managed to get that much information out of somebody on the team. It had been his team at one time after all. Tenzou wondered what Kakashi would’ve done in his situation. Probably saved Lord Third, he thought angrily at himself. He was too rule-oriented, whereas Kakashi was more team-oriented. Kakashi would’ve saved The Hokage. It was one of his lovable traits-the way he prioritized teamwork. Tenzou realized he’d been spacing out and started to get up.

“Let’s go home?” he left it a question, not wanting to make Kakashi feel closed in by the offer. 

The older nin nodded before teleporting them to his own apartment. It had been a long day and neither man was in the mood for sex. The rain steadily tapped against the windows while they laid on the bed in full shinobi gear. Kakashi got up first, opening the fridge to pull out leftovers from the night before. He’d noticed the strange behavior the younger nin had been displaying and knew he had to be the one to take control right now. Tenzou needed him. 

“Do you want an egg?” He called over his shoulder while he warmed everything up over the stove. 

“Two please,” the wood user slipped off his anbu boots and put his sword on the floor beside the bed before laying back down. He tried not to think of Lord Hiruzen or the looks from all the other anbu. He tried to enjoy the sound of food being made, turning his head to see his senpai move around the kitchen busily. He let his eyes roam over the other man’s slim body, smiling. 

Tenzou felt that feeling in his chest he used to hate and inhaled deeply. This time it didn’t feel so bad. He was almost content, thinking that if this was as much of his senpai’s love he’d ever see it would be okay. He was an anbu after all, it was logical to assume he would die at a young age. His mind flashed back to the face of Lord Third dead on the rooftops and he closed his eyes. 

Yes, maybe this was enough. Maybe there was nothing more they could give each other. Maybe he was silly for thinking so.

Tenzou thought about how far they’d come as lovers. How young he’d been when he realized he loved Kakashi. And how ice-cold his senpai’s heart had been in return. He replayed all the moments of their time together in his head, eyes glazed over-Snapping out of it when he was asked to set the table. 

Tenzou ate in silence, still thinking. He knew nothing was guaranteed tomorrow. He knew that Kakashi was his, even if it was only for tonight. That anything could happen to either of them and this could all end. But still.

Some part of his heart longed for more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My headcanon for Tenzou is he’s very patient and easygoing but has the tendency to snap every once in a while then immediately del horrible about it. fear not my lovely readers depressed tenzou will be gone by next chapter !


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi doesn’t run from Tenzou this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys i am so sorry i’ve been working on this for awhile and my GOSH I FEEL HORRIBLE FOR GOING THIS LONG WITH NO CHAPTER AHH - so i added some smut as an apology -.- plz accept it

“Hey Tenz lets fuck,” 

Kakashi was still in his uniform, the bags under his visible eye more pronounced since Sasuke had left the village. Tenzo stopped filling out his mission report and turned to look at the jounin, who was looking at him with a naughty look in his eye. 

“Senpai you know you’re not allowed in the anbu quarters anymore, stop bribing the newbies,” He rolled his eyes at the thought of it, knowing just how convincing the ex-anbu captain could be. 

Not that it was always a bad thing. 

He continued scanning the report for any grammar errors, purposefully ignoring the man in front of him.

“Come on Tenzo, it’s been soooo long since we had sex,” Kakashi was leaning onto the desk now, and the wood user couldn’t help but let his eyes roam a little. 

“Senpai I just fucked you in the bathroom of that takeout restaurant you like, stop making things up.” It was true, sometimes a little risk made it more fun. 

Kakashi turned to face Tenzou directly and leaned across the desk so they were face to face, almost no space between them. His hands covered the scroll the anbu had been writing on.

“Yeah? Well I want you to do it again,” His right eye narrowed to look at the anbu’s lips before flicking back up again, leaning back and standing with his arms crossed in front of him. 

Tenzou couldn’t help but admit he was into the idea, even knowing that his senpai was only sex-crazy because of his genin team disbanding. 

A very fun coping skill indeed. 

“Okay deal, but we’re not having sex in public again, that was my treat since you finally decided to pay for a meal,” Tenzou knew that he had very few cards over his senpai and that was one he wasn’t willing to give up. 

“That’s very rude of you but I suppose I’ll let it slide this time,” Kakashi laughed as he dodged the scroll Tenzou tried to smack him with.

“Meet you at the Hokage mountain in twenty.” The jounin gave one last wave before poofing away.

‘Well now I can’t focus,’ the anbu thought annoyed. He hated when his reports weren’t done to his liking, that’s why he proof-read everyone else’s before turning them all in. 

He finished what he was doing and briefly showered before teleporting to the mountain. He felt out with his chakra for a few moments before feeling the familiar spark of his senpai’s. He headed towards it hesitantly, knowing the tricks the jounin would likely pull. Sure enough he ducked just in time to avoid crashing into the older nin. 

“Kakashi what the hell are you doing on the ceiling?” He tried not to yell, knowing it would have a loud echo. He definitely didn’t want to attract attention to where they were. 

The jounin stopped reading his book and looked at Tenzou, jumping down and gracefully landed on his feet before chuckling. 

“It helps with blood flow, don’t judge me,” He looked so proud of himself for a moment and Tenzou immediately remembered why he loved his smug senpai so much.

He put his gushy feelings aside glancing at Kakashi , who suddenly looked very needy. Laying down the blanket he’d made sure to pack, Tenzou discarded most of his clothes with swiftness only a ninja could. Leaving on his boxer briefs, he reached out to take off Kakashi’s shirt next. 

Kakashi’s eyes went wide as he was pulled down and helped out of his clothes. He looked so innocent at the moment Tenzou couldn’t help but grab his ass roughly. 

“H-heyy!”Kakashi jumped slightly at the contact, trying not to blush from what was happening. It was very cute. 

“You’re so hot like this you know that?” Tenzou pulled him down and flipped positions, leaning over the pale body below him. He kissed Kakashi roughly, knowing the jounin liked a little blood drawn. He bit down on Kakashi’s lower lip and reveled in the soft moan he received in response. He ran his fingers up the hard lines of the jounin’s abs, grinding down against him over and over again. 

Kakashi closed his eyes and reached down, grabbing the anbu’s dick and starting to jerk him off fast. He clenched his hole at the anticipation of Tenzou’s cock in it and let his eyes roll back behind his eyelids. He was very vocal, letting the noises echo off the empty walls of the cave they were in. He knew Tenzou was turned on by it, and he almost laughed as the wood user stripped them both naked in less than two seconds. 

“Keep making noises like that and I’m definitely fucking you hard tonight you little whore,” Tenzou ran his tongue down the jounin’s neck and sucked on a tender spot, biting down when Kakashi let out a soft cry. It was so hot, the noises he was able to get his senpai to make. 

Grabbing the lube and pushing Kakashi’s legs open, Tenzou looked down at the sight in front of him. His dick pulsed at the flushed face below, the lovely hard on and clenching hole that was his to dominate. 

Kakashi really was beautiful. 

“Well fuck me already-”

The older man’s complaint was cut off as Tenzou pressed two fingers into his hole while maintaining eye contact. Starting a slow rhythmic pace that left Kakashi wanting more-but the jounin screwed his eyes shut in defiance, refusing to beg for what he deserved. 

“Kakashi, you know what to do,” the wood user didn’t even try to hide the cockiness in his voice, scissoring his fingers slightly before going back to the achingly slow pace from before. 

Kakashi moaned loudly, reaching up to tug at his own hair before smirking. He knew Tenzou could be impatient as well. He arched his back and clenched his asshole before moaning again, making sure his inner walls squeezed the fingers inside of him. 

“That’s not the response I was looking for. Either you ask like the good boy you are or I’m not going to fuck you tonight.” Tenzou pulled both of his fingers out and sat back on his knees, waiting for a response. He knew Kakashi wanted him to be strict, whether he acted like it or not. 

“Fuck Tenzou please don’t do this to me, I just want you to fuck me, pleaseee,” Kakashi was getting emotional, grabbing the anbu’s hand and shoving it back towards his hole impatiently. Tenzou began fingering him again, eyeing the pretty little nest of grey hair around his pretty little dick. It was a really hot sight. 

“Such a slut, already trying to take more than you’re being offered. You’re so good you know that, you know how good you’re being Kakashi?”

He locked eyes with the man below him and his heart throbbed at the affection there, at the way Kakashi was reacting to the praise. He added a third finger, leaning down to kiss Kakashi, happy with the desperateness he received as response. 

“F-fuckkkkk-” Kakashi slurred as he enjoyed the feeling of Tenzou’s fingers dragging along his inner walls, pressing occasionally into his prostate. Tenzou hadn’t given him a good finger fuck like this in a while. He looked up again at the man above him and realized how vulnerable he was. He felt overstimulated and dizzy. Almost ready to call the safe word despite how vanilla they were being. 

“Hey Tenz..?” he was shaking slightly and the anbu picked up on it immediately, stopping his ministrations. 

“Do you think you could blindfold me?” The jounin blushed as he asked this, reaching for his forehead protector and shoving it towards Tenzou. 

The younger nin knew it wasn’t a kink but a form of avoidance. That his senpai was trying to hide his feelings towards him. Well this was new.

‘Could he be starting to have deeper feelings for me as well?’ 

The anbu tried not to think too much at the moment. He slipped the forehead protector over Kakashi’s eyes and tied a loose knot around his hair, sitting back to appreciate his work. 

Oh this definitely did something for him. 

“You look so sexy,” he said in a low drawn out voice, knowing the other man would like the attention. 

“Shut up and fuck me,” was the response he got. 

Tenzou grabbed Kakashi by his ankles and dragged him towards the end of the blanket before swiftly lubing up his dick and pressing in slowly. 

Once he was fully inside, the anbu started a gentle, quick pace. Lately Kakashi hadn’t been lasting long which was quite the confidence boost. 

“Shit Tenz that’s s-ugh-so good, please don’t stop.” His voiced cracked as the wood user pressed deeper. 

Kakashi was scratching him up pretty bad, mouth open as he panted heavily. Tenzou couldn’t help but watch the jounin as he fucked him. His eyes dilated at the deep blush kakashi had and how his tongue would hang over his bottom lip with each breathe. 

Sure enough, the jounin was soon a shaky mess. “T-tenzou im gonna come soon,” he jerked his head to the side, trying not to be too loud as the anbu fucked him even harder. 

Tenzou let go of one of Kakashi’s ankles to press his hand against the older man’s throat. He watched as his face only turned a deeper red, knowing what would happen next. 

Kakashi bit his lip to try to hold in the groan that left him as he came, nails squeezing the wood users shoulders and drawing blood. He coughed as the hand around his throat tightened suddenly before loosening again and sparkles danced behind his eyelids. He rode out his orgasm as Tenzou continued fucking him, not slowing down at all. 

When he finally came down from his orgasm, Kakashi dropped his hands to the ground and enjoyed the sensitive feeling of being fucked. It was almost too much at the moment but he couldn’t help but squeeze his hole tighter to intensify the feeling. His body spasmed as he was overstimulated. 

Tenzou cursed at the sudden feeling of Kakashi’s tightened asshole and let go of his neck to grab ahold of both ankles again. He was almost there, the familiar feeling of warmth building up in his groin. He focused on the quiet grunts his senpai made as he fucked him deeper, knowing it was probably a little painful for him at this point. He moaned at the feeling of sudden tightness again and knew he was about to come.

“You little whore, you did that on purpose,” Tenzou enjoyed the smirk he received as a response. Kakashi kept tightening his hole, knowing it was doing things to him. 

The anbu cursed as he finally came, filling Kakashi as he pushed in a deep as he could. He pulled out after he caught his breath, watching the semen leak out of his senpai obscenely. 

Kakashi took the blindfold off and looked down at himself, completely exhausted. 

“You are so hot it’s not even funny,” Tenzou bent down to lick his come off of Kakashi’s reddened hole, not caring it was his own seed. He smiled inwardly at the small sound his senpai made at the sight and leaned forward to kiss the man aggressively. 

He didn’t expect the sob that escaped the other man as he did. Kakashi looked just as surprised at himself too and glanced up at Tenzou as he held in another cry. 

“It’s not you,” the older nin said shakily as he moved to sit up. He took a deep breath and exhaled before looking back at the anbu again.

Tenzou just watched, knowing that sometimes his senpai needed a moment to respond. He would wait for hours if that’s how long it took. 

He started putting his uniform back on, wiping off the fluids he’d gotten on himself. He gave Kakashi his clothes and helped him dress as well, silently noting the shaky hands and rapid pulse. He packed the blanket and lube before sitting back on his hands and watching Kakashi again. 

“I’m a bad sensei aren’t I?” Kakashi finally spoke, not making eye contact with him. He sounded so small at the moment, it hurt to listen to. 

“You’re not a bad sensei, and you weren’t a bad captain either. Don’t do this to yourself Kakashi,” He made sure to use his name, knowing that the other nin needed to hear it out loud. 

He hadn’t ever seen Kakashi show much emotion and it was very heart-wrenching to watch as the other man tried to hold himself together. He hadn’t ever seen this side of the jounin before. 

Kakashi fought the urge to teleport away and instead collapsed onto the cave floor covering his face with his arm. He wanted to be by Tenzou. 

He laid like that for a few minutes before finally looking over at the anbu, who was watching him hesitantly. 

“Well don’t just look at me like that, come over here I’m lonely,” He tried to force a smile but failed, looking up at the ceiling again. 

Tenzou got up and walked over to Kakashi, stopping to stand over him, smiling. Of course he would try to cover his emotions with some false sense of humor. His senpai was so weird. 

“If you don’t stop being gross about it I’m going to leave you here by yourself,” Kakashi huffed, embarrassed.

Tenzou laughed and moved to lay beside him, arms and legs sprawled out wide. He glanced over at Kakashi, who was doing also sprawled out with his hands behind his head, seemingly carefree. Tenzou noted the tenseness in his body though, and his smiled faltered for a moment. 

Neither of them spoke, instead just staring up at the dark cave silently. Tenzou startled at a sudden movement in the corner of his eye and looked over to see Kakashi’s hand open in invitation. The jounin still wasn’t looking at him. He took it softly and began instinctively rubbing his thumb over the tops of the jounin’s hand. 

He closed his eyes and wished that time would stop for the next few hours. Listening to Kakashi’s breathing slow down and even out was a relief. As cliché as it was, Tenzou was jealous of civilians and their normal lives. As shinobi he would never get that chance. He wondered how different his life would’ve been if it weren’t for Orochimaru. But then he wouldn’t have met senpai. 

“I love you Kakashi,” he needed to put it out there again. He needed him to hear it again. They both had their missions, and tomorrow wasn’t ever guaranteed. 

Kakashi didn’t respond. But he didn’t have to. Tenzou knew he wasn’t ready yet. And that was okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stayed tuned for next chapters conflict lol. i’ll be trying to have it out by mid december but no promises since i am a horrible procrastinator(:
> 
> also are there any short fics u guys would want? it doesn’t have to be kakayama


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